>What do you call the 2nd best guitar player in a band?

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-The bass player.


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>What's longer than a drum solo?

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-Nothing.


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>What do you call a musician that just broke up with his girlfriend?

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-Homeless.


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>What's "Perfect Pitch"?

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-The sound of a banjo hitting the back of a dumpster.

(I actually like the banjo, but I know some 
guitarists can't stand them.)